TIPSLIFEHACKS

Let's be honest, juggling the demands of single motherhood is a full-time job. For one Australian mum, the relentless cycle of work, childcare, and household chores led to a surprising and deeply personal consequence: seven years without sexual intimacy. She's bravely sharing her story, revealing the complexities of her journey and challenging the often-unspoken realities faced by many single parents.

“I tell people I used an anonymous sperm donor because I couldn't find a bloke to marry me,” she confesses. “It sometimes gets a laugh. It's much more complicated than that, of course.” And it is. The story isn't simply about a lack of romantic partners; it's about a woman navigating a period of intense personal struggle and making difficult choices.

The mum’s journey began with a battle against binge drinking, a pattern established in the late 1980s. While she had a few relationships along the way, none progressed to a lasting commitment. The focus, understandably, became her child. The sheer exhaustion and emotional weight of raising a child alone often pushed personal needs to the bottom of the priority list.

“It’s not about blaming anyone,” she explains. “It’s about acknowledging the reality that when you’re solely responsible for another human being, your own desires and needs can easily get lost in the shuffle. There's a constant pressure to provide, to protect, to be everything for your child. Finding time, energy, and the emotional space for a romantic relationship, let alone sexual intimacy, feels almost impossible.”

Her decision to use a sperm donor, while initially presented with a touch of humour, underscores the deeper need to build a family on her own terms. It was a pragmatic choice born out of circumstance and a desire for motherhood.

This candid account sheds light on a critical, often-overlooked aspect of single parenthood: the impact on personal wellbeing and intimate relationships. It’s a reminder that while single parents are celebrated for their strength and resilience, their own needs deserve recognition and support. It also encourages open conversations about the challenges faced by those navigating single parenthood, breaking down the stigma and fostering a more understanding and compassionate society. It’s a story of survival, of making tough choices, and ultimately, of finding strength in independence.

The mum’s story isn’t meant to elicit pity, but rather to spark a conversation. A conversation about the pressures on modern families, the challenges faced by single parents, and the importance of prioritising self-care, even when it feels like there’s no time.